16.1.14

Parenting: A Blessing & A Curse

Hey folks! It's cold today. It's winter so it's no surprise, but still. I guess it's no biggie since we made it through that "snowpocalypse" last week. Anyway, I'm not here to talk about that right now. I'm here because I need an outlet - one that I've been struggling with actually using for awhile, but today I need it so here goes everything.

I'm struggling y'all. Parenting is a HUGE struggle for me whether anyone (aside from my close family) have noticed. I love my son to life & I am always very aware of just how much of a blessing he is to us. BUT lately we've been going through a bit of a rough patch. And y'all ... I'm failing miserably at this discipline thing. Seriously, I've never been big on physical discipline because I feel like it should only be used for dire cases, but my child has pushed me pass my "patient" limits. It's like he hates me (no, he doesn't, but it feels that way) and I can't seem to be a good enough mom to him. But then he loves me and I just can't get him off of me with all that kissing & hugging. It's really cute, but too much for me at times. So y'all, ya girl is reaching out.

I'm now about to open up my closet for all to see cause I think I'm the root of my child's anger issues. He loves me, but doesn't know how to constructively deal with anger. I have got to do better before we run my poor husband ragged mediating our foolishness. Yeah, I have to admit lil man and I are both on some foolishness right now and our household is a war-zone because of it. Well, it's time for a change & I can only change myself so like I said here we go.

I'm going to take a lil time each day to just do a quick blog about what's going on with me as it pertains to this closet of mine that my child is exposing to me. Funny thing, he does not show most people his crazy so most only know my side of dealing with him. I'd love for somebody to hear his side so I can adjust accordingly, but he also talks mostly to me & dad. Quirky lil family we have here! Anyway ...

I also think that this just may be the year I deal with all of my avoided issues head-on. I'm really too grown to still be so angry, but I'm pretty good at masking it. My husband likens me unto The Hulk with that anger issue. Because I'm angry all the time, I've figured out how to control it. I, however, don't do well with other people's anger issues cause well I cannot control them. And let's face it - I usually think they are doing it all wrong. This includes my lil man. I have got to do better y'all. I know I can't control this child, but I felt like he should just know because he was a part of me for so long. Well, I was am wrong and it's time I right this thing for our family's sake.

How does one teach a toddler to control his anger when you've finally lost control of your own anger after years of having it under control? Well, we'll address that later cause right now I need to get ready for a presentation ... Angry? Well, come on back later to figure out how to control it or at least my plans for teaching my lil man how he too can learn to not only control his anger, but deal with it constructively as well.

Later y'all!!