5.4.13

Alone in ...

... Orlando for a work conference. My main objective was recruiting so I had no plans to attend lectures that I didn't understand. That meant a great family mini-vacay except the trip was last minute. Flight tickets were way too expensive for the fam to go, but I still had to go. Oh joy. So now, I plan to attend the various lectures if I can possibly figure out an ounce of what they speak. Here's how it went.

I got on the Struggle Bus as soon as I landed in Florida. It all began with my stupid phone keeping absolutely NO kind of charge. The phone wasn't even on during the flight & it was already on Orange when we landed. What the foolishness? Yeah, so it began. It was on Red before we got to the resort AND I couldn't check into my room for some hours. So I sat down near an outlet and had lunch until it was time to go over and do what I needed to do. Phone was pretty much dead all evening because the doggone thing wouldn't charge. Stupid phone.

When I tell you that every day was rough, I mean everyday I was on the struggle bus. Yeah, there's plenty to do in Orlando even at the resort, but I just had no desire to do anything that my family would have enjoyed. Not to mention the issues I was having with my phone so I was tethered to a socket. My 2 men may think they missed me, but I seriously was depressed without them. Barely ate, very little social interaction (didn't know anyone anyway), and the list goes on. Even the interenet connection was a waste. I wanted to cry when I couldn't even have a successful Hangout with them without an interruption in service. [I don't cry much, but when I do ...]

It was sad, but it was also very enlightening. As much as I enjoyed being single & couldn't see myself being married with a kid, I now realize how much we've really evolved into one over these 6/7 years. It's really awesome that someone as hermit-ous as I am can be transformed into wanting to experience the fullness of life cause my soul mate craves it. All I kept thinking was "they would have enjoyed this trip!" Everything I saw was related back to them.

So for all those who are able to travel by yourselves, more power to you for that. I am not about that life. I need my family with me & realize my life is very sad when I'm not with them. That may change one day, but I'm doubtful cause we're in this together & we have fun with each other. We're best friends & don't enjoy being apart especially when it involves lots of fun & sun.

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