29.4.13

An Inner Quickening

Some days I feel like I have ADD, ADHD, or something. Why? Because my mind is moving quicker than my body is willing or can. It’s so quick that most of the time, I lose thoughts before I can even get them out completely. Sometimes, thoughts don’t ever really make it out of my mind. It’s sad.

Now, while that bothers me, there’s something that bothers me even more. That’s when my inner quickening happens. What’s that? Yeah, I don’t know really. I THINK it may be the quickening of my spirit, BUT I don’t know what that means or feels like either. Anyway, this inner quickening doesn’t have a usual-ness to it. I can’t say it’s gonna happen in church, at home, at work, after I pray, after I eat, while I’m listening to music, etc. I just can’t say. I just know when it happens, I’m sort of paralyzed. It’s like my entire body is running at supersonic speed, but not really. I’m not physically moving that fast, but …
    … if I sit, my legs are bouncing (I used to call it a nervous switch)
    … if I’m walking, it’s a struggle to not speed up (I like to walk slow)
    … at the same time, my mind is spinning at the same speed if not faster
    … and my heart rate is also elevated
Hhmmm - maybe it’s like fire in my bones???

Seriously, can anybody let me know if they’ve experienced this and what it may be causing this? Most recently it happened after I had just asked for prayer from someone that I consider near & dear, and then again later that day after we had our family prayer.

Oh yeah, it also drains me of all of my energy when everything slows back down. Any takers on what is going on here?